Owning Who You Are – Be YOU

We live in a society that asks you to be yourself, yet everyone judges you. Ironic, right? This blog will talk about how to “just be yourself!” and how to OWN that! Feel free to read it all or just the sections that are relevant to you.

They tell you to be yourself, then they judge you for being “too ambitious,” “unproductive,” “too hot,” “not hot enough,” “too loud,” “too quiet,” “too thin,” “too fat,” “too energetic,” “too boring,” and the list goes on because they won’t shut the fuck up and mind their own business.

Figure Out Who You Are

I talked a lot before about spending time alone to figure out who you are & what you want but I haven’t explained what to do in that alone time. In a time like this, we literally have all the time in the world to study, talk on the phone, blog, read and many more. So don’t even try to use the excuse of not having enough time. The last thing you want to do is be behind the screen all the time where people are posting negative shit and fake news.

Here is an exercise I want you to do (Don’t be lazy):
  1. Get a notebook or a few papers and write down every category of your life. The human experience really falls down to passion, purpose, career, friendships, family, relationship/love, finances, education, confidence, diet, mental health, physical health, etc…
  2. Next to each category give it a rating out of 10
  3. Write a goal to make the rating a little higher (so if it’s 4/10, make the goal to 5/10 or 6/10. Not higher. It’s a step by step process)
  4. Under each category write down what you don’t like about this category (don’t be afraid to write 2 or 800 – there’s no wrong way around this) and then next to each dislike or underneath it, write what you can do turn it around AND what you want instead. For example:

Confidence 6/10 GOAL: 8/10
* I compare my success to others
[ Shift the focus back to me and set daily reminders that everyone is on a different journey. Read my own blog about comparison]

– Write three positive affirmations after you do all the above then cross out all the ‘dislikes.’ Look at the ‘solution(s)’ and the ‘affirmations’ DAILY.
Example:

Confidence 6/10 GOAL: 8/10
* I compare my success to others
[ Shift the focus back to me and set daily reminders that everyone is on a different journey. Read my own blog about comparison]
* I don’t think I am intelligent enough
[I will catch that thought and remind myself that someone else’s opinion doesn’t matter. And I will read more books about XYZ]
Affirmations:
1- I am more than fucking enough
2- I am as intelligent as a German Shepherd
3- I’m the coolest thing since vegan cheese πŸ˜‰

That’s how you figure out what you dislike and what exactly you want. Doing this exercise you realise the solutions and all the answers that you hold. I know emotional intelligence and mental health are two things that people find difficult to control and this exercise should help you. You can also read my blog about being too emotional – if you find yourself reacting too much or crying easily for instance.

Stop Getting In Your Own Way

This is a tough love section and you need to hear it just like I do.
I’m not dismissing ANYONE’s feelings or circumstances because I know everyone is on a different journey and we all react differently. BUT every single one of us is GUILTY of getting in our own way. Answer this right now, what in the living fuck are you getting out of self-sabotage?? Why won’t you let yourself chill for a MINUTE and take a breather? Why won’t you sit your ass down for an hour and realise that YOU ARE THE ONE SETTING YOUR OWN LIMITATIONS! Yes, you are setting your own limitations when you say you’re not good enough, attractive enough, bla bla bla enough. Some of you even have good things and wonderful people, yet you sabotage by saying “it’s too good to be true. I’m gonna walk away” and then you let yourself back to toxic environments and surround yourself with horse shit, and then you complain that life is hard. Really? You sit on horse shit and complain about shit on your clothes? If you choose to sit on horse shit, get the fuck up, change into cleaner clothes and shower. Don’t complain and jump back in there like ew stop. ‘Horse shit’ is also letting people walk all over you, even if it’s family.

You judge yourself by saying you’re NOT enough even though you REALLY want this particular thing… Like, really? You’re judging it? You don’t get to. If you want a particular thing, stop getting in of your own way. If you have to write down what you CAN control in that situation and implement that, go for it. But if you want to stay in that victim mindset, be my guest and see how that works for you. I can guarantee that till this day it hasn’t worked. You don’t get to complain if you make the DECISION to get in your own way. That shit thought or limiting belief could be knocking on your door all day you don’t have to open that door or even listen. You flip it and you bounce it, you bounce it, you bounce it ALL day if you have to. I can have a doubt or an insecurity 230 times and I still choose to reaffirm 237 times that I’m more than enough. I tell that thought, literally to PISS OFF. If you talk to someone the way you talk to yourself, they would probably dump you right away. Admit it.

I got this background from Roxy Talks affirmations playlist – her confidence and success affirmations are the ones I love to listen to

Start implementing changes and STOP voicing an unwanted thought just because you were programmed to believe that. Today, tell that thought ‘Try me’ or ‘Piss off!’ You know what I say every single day? “I’m ALWAYS in control and EVERYTHING is exactly what I say it is.” I’m not anything special, I’m just really fucking dedicated to my own success and you can pick up on that energy any moment. I reached a point where I was DONE giving power to outside opinions or even my own because it’s unproductive. I proclaim my power daily because I refuse to give my power to something so irrelevant to my life. If my body needs to cry, I’ll let it purge, but that won’t interfere with my MIND because my mind is locked on my manifestations.

Wear Your Values with Pride

Values = Ethical values, opinions, standards related to work/people or spiritual beliefs

Here is a personal example:
Since September 2019, I turned vegan for dietary, environmental and ethical reasons. There are a lot of outside perspectives and criticisms from different people and a lot of the things I hear are from cultural perceptions or just stupidity (“How do you get protein?” Watch The Game Changers on Netflix and understand the food chain). Personally I find it VERY insulting when people talk shit about veganism because they don’t pay for my groceries so it’s none of their business. Veganism isn’t harming anyone and everyone has the free will to eat what they want to eat. (Besides all global pandemics came from consuming animal products like bird’s flu and swine flu – vegan for health reasons too). I do believe that I should raise awareness about animal cruelty BUT I DON’T BELIEVE I HAVE THE RIGHT TO ATTACK ANYONE.

Even though there is a lot of food in every culture that’s vegan friendly people think they have the right to have an opinion about what I eat that isn’t harming anyone. In my culture, every single meal is served with meat, so I get a lot of ‘jokes’ about that. Do you think I give a fuck? No. Because I believe in my own values and I know why I chose that to begin with. If I don’t agree with something, I either don’t participate or I say something about it. If something is real and important to you, then it is. End of story.

Here is my belief and concept – If I do, say or wear something that isn’t harming anyone or myself, then you don’t get a say in my business. No one has the right to bully you, talk you down, give you ultimatums, manipulate you or patronise you.
My choice of clothing or career is not adding or taking away anything from your life. It’s just very unproductive when people focus on things like that are absolutely irrelevant to their life. You weren’t born to please people and you didn’t sign a contract either. Own and respect your own values first.

Take Your Power Back | Develop MENTAL Resilience

We are conditioned to believe that we’re limited, invaluable and other bullshit. Part of my self-growth journey is that I had to change my internal dialogue by reminding myself every single time “Nope. My body isn’t ugly – that’s my ex talking not me.” I had MAJOR insecurities so I had to catch myself at every thought and replace that thought with something productive, positive or relevant to where I wanted to be with myself. You can call it lying to yourself, but you’re already lying to yourself by saying that you’re unworthy of love or success. Lying to myself worked, and if it felt too much, I would take a break and then I would write down all of my qualities. A quality doesn’t have to be “discovered a new planet” fuck that. Something as small as “made someone smile this week” is good enough. It means I made someone feel 2% better which is a beautiful thing and that’s why I’m beautiful. You see how you can flip and turn a thought into something bigger and so beautiful? If you find it hard to monitor your thoughts, then monitor your feelings. Thoughts create emotions, so if you feel insecure about something, then subconsciously you thought that. Remember, the power lies within you.

Something you HAVE TO understand is that when something happens, you have the opportunity to decide whether it’s good or bad. When I get a text message from someone telling me that I should stop cursing on social media that tells me that I’m doing something right. It shows me that I chose to use my freedom of speech which I’m grateful for to get my point across or to raise awareness. So thank you for the text, it’s a good reminder πŸ™‚ Something like what’s happening in our world now tells me Earth needs to breathe and so do we. Air pollution is falling, people are looking after their health better, we’re counting our blessings (people, food, health, money to purchase things) and being more mindful about what we eat.

I wrote an entire blog about personal resilience so feel free to check it out if you think you need that resource.

Accountability vs Self-degrading

I briefly talked about this before in my blogs but for the purpose of this topic, I will explain the difference between accountability and being self-degrading quickly.
Accountability = Knowing where you went wrong and areas of improvement needed. It’s choosing to look at failure and mistakes as an OPPORTUNITY to evolve and amp up your strengths even more.
Self-degrading = the language you use which puts you down that makes you feel any negative emotion about yourself. It’s blaming yourself and talking to yourself like you talk to a nemesis.

Raise Your Standards

Think of one thing that you want right now, lets say ‘healthy relationship.’ You have to ask yourself what is a healthy relationship to you? Don’t be vague by saying ‘ a gentleman,’ well what’s a gentleman to you? Write down or discuss with someone what you’re looking for in a partner AND the deal breakers. Deal breakers could be – [TRIGGER WARNING]: abusive language, body shaming, degrading, etc… Figure out what is love to you. That also applies to friendships, career, health and many more. Something I heard Mary Jelkovsky say about health is “If IMAGE and NUMBER didn’t exist, what does health look like to you?” In any area of your life, ask yourself what does that mean to you and what are the deal breakers. Raising your standards allows you to cultivate fulfilling relationships and satisfaction in every area of your life. Anything that doesn’t match that standard is what you tell smooth sails and god’s speed if you can’t change that or fix it.

Finding Like-Minded People

For me personally, talking about the environment is also touchy subject for some reason because people CLING to their habits, I am vegan and I believe in the law of attraction (watch The Secret on Netflix), so there’s a lot that I feel like I can’t discuss. That doesn’t mean my beliefs or values are WRONG. It just means I have to find more open-minded people and like-minded communities. So I joined a program called Environmental Leadership where we get to expand our knowledge about the environment and all the volunteers are students my age, and we’re working together on a social action campaign. As for law of attraction, I join social media groups where I can make online friends, be my true self and share my two scents.

I got this background from Roxy Talks affirmations playlist – her confidence and success affirmations are the ones I love to listen to

If you have to take screenshots or save this blog, please do so. Don’t just read it and go back to old habits then wonder how to be yourself. Also, remember that the right people are the ones that accept you for who you are and they love being part of your self-development journey.
“I pledge to check in with my feelings every day.”

New Year, New Me – Officially HEALED!

If you have read my last two blogs, you know that I have been going through depression and I wasn’t feeling present at all as my mind was stuck in the past from a few triggers. I talked in depth about that in that blog and I talked in that second blog about my depression and when I was diagnosed 2-3 years ago.

As a lot of you know, since I started blogging I have been sharing my journey and my healing from a lot of residual past shit. I shared my insecurities and my struggle with body image, self-love, confidence, anxiety, depression, social anxiety, body dysmorphia and trusting people after a lot of betrayals and heartbreaks. 2019 was solely focused on improving myself image and becoming my own best friend which I did! This year I chose to focus on completely letting go and moving on… It’s safe to say – I HAVE COMPLETELY HEALED!!!!!!

I already shared in my depression blog a few things that I have been doing which really helped me feel better. I haven’t shared my ‘Strict Mental Diet.’ Doing that, I have found my power and my own goddamn crown! I feel more ready than ever for new experiences and relationships, and mostly because I am NO LONGER holding ANY grudges against ANYONE. I DON’T feel angry at anyone or hurt at all – I forgave them all and I really dug deep till I got to the root of every problem (explained in previous blog in depth). I don’t even feel like I need anyone’s apology anymore and it’s safe to say that I developed the peace of mind I have been seeking. I have been taking my time off for that which I am absolutely proud of!

Strict Mental Diet

So what is the mental diet that I’m talking about?
Well, I am in a Facebook group where I posted a 30-Day challenge intended to reprogram our SUBCONSCIOUS minds and to take our power back! Before I talk about this more, let me explain what I mean by ‘3D reality.’ 3D reality is the term I like to use on this world we live in where we perceive our current reality. In your 3D world this person did XYZ, this person said that, this happened to your financial life and this happened to your career life, etc… The truth is, we don’t really know what’s real and what isn’t. There are things always happening beyond our consciousness and not everything is the way it seems.

I talked before about the ‘Law of Attraction,’ which is a law in quantum physics just like the Law of Gravity. The law of attraction states that ‘likes attract likes.’ What does that mean? It means that whatever you believe, think about and emotionalise is what you attract into your life. Do you believe that people are constantly using you? Look at your life, everyone is using you, right? This happens because we keep reaffirming those beliefs based on past experiences or others experiences. That law states that in order to manifest something you ‘Ask, Believe, Receive.’ Apparently this has also been discussed in religions (not sure if in all religions – if you’re religious) , that whatever you ask God, The Universe (whatever you believe in) and you have a firm belief that it will happen WITHOUT reacting to the 3D world, that’s when you’re open to receiving your manifestations. I said ‘this reality’ because according to quantum physics we live in multiverse (science is fucking amazing and fun! Bring on the aliens!). Don’t believe me? Read about ‘string theory’ and ‘double-slit experiment.’

Read or watch The Secret to understand The Law of Attraction better- as a summary it says that in order to manifest something you have to be in vibrational alignment – meaning you have TO BE IT without obsessing over it (for example, you have to feel rich and believe you’re wealthy – that’s a vibrational alignment with wealth) and then you begin to attract it to your life. “You attract what you are, not what you want.” Obviously, you won’t just attract things if you have limiting beliefs deep rooted in you. That’s exactly why I created that ‘Strict Mental Diet’ and I focused on forgiveness as well (explained more in the previous blog). As for ‘scripting,’ I also talked briefly about this in my previous blog, it’s basically writing a paragraph or as many as you want as the type of person you aspire to be and the things you aspire to have but writing it in present tense. I will keep saying this – THE BEST MOTIVATION IS THE ONE YOU FIND WITHIN YOU!

The best thing that I have been doing since last year is focusing on MYSELF! My confidence keeps increasing more and more and I feel so invincible. I am no longer reacting to shit circumstances, because that’s not where I want to invest my energy. I trust and believe that everything is happening FOR ME and NOT TO ME, because I know that I deserve the best. I am worthy and deserving of a full happy life. If anything, I set an example to this world that NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS WITH YOU – true friendships exist, love is real, that everything is a choice and that being fearless is possible.

Affirm these to yourself OUT LOUD AND SAY THEM LIKE YOU MEAN IT:

– I am MORE than fucking enough!
– I am an incredible and magical being!
– Every single day in a variety of ways I am becoming better and better!
– I am fearless and badass!
– I am so fucking powerful!
– I am in control of my life!
– I always get what I want and I am now getting everything that I want!
– I am capable of doing and becoming ANYTHING!
– My success in life is inevitable!

Self-love is SO FUCKING IMPORTANT! Love yourself truly and unconditionally till you see your worth. There is NO SUCH THING as ‘not good enough’ or ‘incapable.’ YOU are setting those limitations for yourself! So take some accountability and stop looking at the world from a small window. Accountability is NOT the same as self-degrading, remember that. Learn to trust whatever you believe in (God/The Universe, etc) without wondering ‘how’ or ‘when.’ When you truly believe in something, you don’t wonder when it’s going to happen or how. Tell yourself now: I am the ‘what’ and the ‘now’ NOT the ‘when’ or the ‘how.‘ Place your order, let it come to you and go after what you want to go after. If ‘fear’ is what’s stopping you, go read this blog for a little push AND this one for ways to deal with that dickhead fear.

Reminder: Do What Frightens You

I’m sure by now you’ve all heard the terrible news of the famous basketball player that passed away, Kobe Bryant and his daughter. Whether or not you knew him before the new and regardless of what kind of person he way, I know for a fact that news like this can get us all thinking about life in general.

Rest In Peace

I only heard of Kobe a few times, as I am not that up-to-date with sport celebrities. I only saw him in a few videos, like on James Cordon’s episode of ‘Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts.’ So I was more shocked to hear the news than anything really since I never really followed Kobe on any of his social media accounts. It got me thinking though which terrified me – This man had a daughter and a wife… His daughter died with him and his wife was waiting for both of them to make it back, and they DIDN’T. How scary is that? Knowing that in a blink of an eye people can be taken away from us… The thing is, we always say that when we hear about someone famous or a family member/friend passing away, yet we still go on our lives fighting over petty shit and missing out on opportunities or experiences, because we say ‘We still have time.’ Well I’m sure those who passed away didn’t think the day before that they were out of time…

You might be reading this and thinking “what a sad blog.” Before you press ‘exit,’ let me remind you that all of my blogs are written in the pursuit of personal empowerment and giving others a sense of inspiration. Talking about reality might be sad but we have to face it at some point, and the reality is that we can lose people any minute. So take the damn time and think of everything that scares you – AND DO THEM ALL! Nope, I am not asking you to jump without a parachute, that’s just reckless and dumb. If it’s something reckless or inappropriate then DONT do it. I’m saying stand up for what you really believe in, go after those dreams you’ve always had, do more good to this world and raise awareness, love with an open and big heart and fight for those you care about, go after that job opportunity you’ve been delaying because you were so afraid of getting ‘rejected.’ Rejection is part of life! You WILL BE rejected from jobs, friends, lovers and so on. That is just part of life but you never know until you try and sometimes it’s better to know than wonder if it would’ve worked out and live in regret. Sometimes even rejection takes you to paths you never thought you’d cross!

Go after what’s impossible if it feels at some level that it can be yours. Fight the greatest enemy in the world – FEAR – Refuse to let it invade your mind and control your feelings and actions. Quit running and delaying – JUST FUCKING DO IT! If you’re still thinking about it, then you still want to go for it – SO GO AFTER THAT DREAM NO MATTER WHAT ANYONE SAYS – Because life is too short to spend it with those who don’t support you or appreciate your company. If you keep running from the things that scare you, you might miss out on something really good that could’ve added more value and spark to your life. If the people within your circle love you enough, they will come around at some point and if they don’t, then they don’t care as much as you want them to.

Really ask yourself now – What do I want in life? What moments do I want to experience? What memories do I want to make? Which people do I want to spend the most time with? Which paths do I want to pursue? What will I regret of I run or delay it further? Who are my real friends that want to see me happy and I can trust 100%? Who do I really want in my life? What things have I wanted to stand up for and I haven’t? What have I been wanting to say out loud but too scared? If you’re still too terrified to take action, then go ahead and read my previous blog about overcoming fears and negative beliefs here. We’re all afraid of at least one thing, and because I didn’t want to think deep about this topic (which I ended up doing like a mofo), I refused to text/call people I care about and tell them how much before it’s “too late.” [Even the thought of it sucks]. So, being the not-so-courageous person I am, I wrote this: (See photo below)

Since last year, I have made big changes internally and externally which I regret none of – distancing myself from emotional vampires and energy suckers that don’t add value to my life or appreciate my presence was one step closer to a happier life. From this day onwards, I won’t be ‘not-so-courageous’ and I will embrace every moment of my life. I came into this world alone with my own life and I’ll leave it alone, so how I choose to live it and the obstacles I choose to overcome will be in my hands. Same goes for you – the ball is in YOUR court and life is lived on your terms – not your culture or society’s expectations. And just because I am writing this blog it doesn’t mean I don’t have fears, I still very much do, but every hour of the day is time to make a decision – time to act and be brave!

Ask yourself today, on a scale of 1-10 where am I at with my career life? (just an example). Lets say your career life is 6/10 and friendships 3/10, ask yourself what you can do today to up to a 7/10 in career life and 4/10 in friendships? It’s okay if the answer doesn’t come right away, you WILL figure it out!

Sending tons of love and light to anyone grieving right now… And please remember that just like bad things can happen out of the blue, wonderful news arrive any minute! Also, you can always create NEW beliefs – check out those blogs here.

The POWER Lies Within You <3

It’s 04:00 in the morning and I am supposed to head to bed, but I felt SUPER INSPIRED to write this! I have been wanting my first blog of 2020 to be FUCKING BOMB, but I wasn’t sure which blog post to share – THIS IS THE ONE <3 Whether this year has begun wonderful or stressful so far, LET ME give you that positive energy that I hold within. Most importantly, I will answer the question I get a lot which is “how do you keep your vibes up?”/ “how are you always happy?” [Obviously I am NOT ALWAYS happy, but I am like 90% of the time]

“As above, so below, as within, so without.”
Ever heard of that saying? This quote explains that your internal energy reflects the external. But how? Us human beings, we are logical beings, so I will explain this logically before jumping to give you some GOOD vibes and energy, as I write this from the heart! In quantum physics, there are laws just like the law of gravity, in this case, I am talking about the law of attraction. Law of attraction states that likes attracts like, so whatever thoughts and beliefs you hold depending on how and where you were raised and your life experience – THAT IS WHAT MANIFESTS INTO YOUR LIFE – I know what you’re thinking… ‘That’s bullshit.’

Nope. Trust me, it is NOT. Let me ask you something RIGHT NOW – do you believe that you’re unlucky? If you answered ‘yes,’ how are things working out for you? My guess is that you’re always hitting roadblocks and an awful luck. Ever looked at someone who perceives themselves as ‘lucky?’ Lucky people perceive themselves that way, and that’s what they became. Still don’t believe me? Well let me convince you.

Close your eyes now and say OUT LOUD like you mean it “I AM POWERFUL”
Open your eyes.
Close your eyes again and say OUT LOUD like you mean it “I AM WEAK”
Open your eyes.

Do you notice the difference in how you felt and your posture? That’s how powerful our words, thoughts and emotions are. Psychology states that the moment you say ‘I AM’ that is what you start to become. How many of you here say “I AM BROKE?” What’s your circumstance now? Now think back to a time where you were financially stable and just remember how you perceived yourself in that moment and how you felt. Obviously, roadblocks are a part of life, but we do have massive control over our circumstances. When you were financially stable, at some point before that you visualised yourself as wealthy in future and you felt it in your heart centre. The more you believe a thought and emotionalise it, that is what you start to become. The more you focus on something, the more you start to notice it every where. If your focus is on stress and struggle, you see even more stress and struggle. What you direct your focus on is what you see, think and feel more of.

If you want to understand this topic on a deeper level, go watch The Secret or read the book. Either way, I will in future write a blog specifically for the ‘Law of Attraction’ and explain more the process of ‘ask, believe, receive.’ These have been proven by quantum physics, psychology and even in a lot of religions if you’re religious. I will also share REAL LIFE examples and experiences, and how I CHANGED my belief system for the better. For the time being you can check out my other blog about reprogramming your subconscious mind here.

YOU hold SO MUCH POWER within you! Believe it or not, YOU are your own hero. People can bring you down, yes. People can hurt you. Life can be unfair. But the choice to get on your healing journey and be a badass is one that YOU make! You are capable of doing almost ANYTHING – YES YOU ARE! Stop setting yourself limitations and being a slave to FEAR (F.E.A.R. = False.Evidence.Appearing.Real.) So get up and get yourself feeling AMAZING! READ THESE OUT LOUD TO YOURSELF NOW:

I am CAPABLE.
I am RESILIENT.
I have the ability to go above and beyond.
I rise above any circumstance.
I am STRONG!
I am TALENTED!
I am FUCKING POWERFUL!!!!!!

How Do I Keep My Vibes Up?

– Daily affirmations:
Every single morning AND night, I affirm out loud who I am! “I am confident, calm and complete.” “I am MORE than fucking enough!” “I am calm & in control of my emotions.” “I am the best version of myself.” “I am happy and enjoying every moment of my life.” As I say these, I feel it in my soul and stomach, and I say it like I fucking mean it. If you start your morning with “this day already sucks,” every little thing starts to piss you off and everything goes wrong.

– Intention:
I cannot stress the power of our intentions. Let me give you a past example – As the dumb teenager I was, I was mostly attracted to fuckbois/bad boys. I intended to be with a fuckboi one day (I did mention that I was a dumb teenager) and I always pictured in my head that would be the next ‘boyfriend.’ And guess what? I ended up with a fuckboi for 3 years… Early last year, I made a list of ‘Must haves’ and ‘Deal Breakers’ for every single person that comes into my life. The ‘must haves’ are the qualities that I believe the people that I’ll be around the most should hold and the deal breakers are the characteristics that I know will let me pack a bag and hold a sign of ‘See You Never,’ which led me to end a 6-year friendship and develop BEAUTIFUL relationships and enhance the ones I already have. So the moral of this story is to set a daily intention – Today I will be….. Today I choose to…. and that’s what I look forward to the rest of the day. What you intend becomes your focus, and what you focus on is what you begin to manifest.

Gratitude:
I remind myself DAILY the things I am grateful for – big AND small. Start with a list of 5 things, then add another 5, and keep on adding another 5 till you’re done. This could be something as small as ‘had a coffee with a friend’ or ‘heater at home.’

Close up of a woman hand writing on a notebook outdoor lying on the grass in a park

– Daily goals:
Every single night, I plan the next day. And when I say set daily goals it doesn’t have to be ‘Become Einstein and read all physics books.’ Just tasks AND reminders throughout the day to look forward to. Win the night to win the morning. Win the morning to win the day.

– Daily Motivational Video/Podcast:
Since mid 2018, I have been watching daily videos that give me a little boost. I will post some of them at the end of this blog.

Meditation (Sometimes)
I have an application called ‘Insight Timer’ and obviously, YouTube.

Self-love Reminder:
I give myself that love to myself daily (and no it’s not narcissistic, ice your clits/balls). I either write down reasons why I am worthy of a magical life and why I am a great person or I write a short letter (even one paragraph) or some notes to myself. Your relationship with yourself sets the tone to every relationship in your life. You are the most important person in your world, and if you’re not, start reading my self-love and confidence blogs.

Be present:
We all have thoughts flowing here and there all the time. So I do those two:
1) 4-fold-breath: Breathing in for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, breathe out for 4 seconds and remain empty for 4 seconds. Repeat till you relax.
2) 5-4-3-2-1 method: Writing down 5 things you see, 4 things you feel (for example: back touching the chair, foot on the floor, phone in hand, etc…), 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste. – Bring yourself back to the present

– Enjoying my own company:
I wrote an entire blog about this here

– Make myself laugh:
Maybe it’s my sense of humour, but I make myself laugh DAILY!! Whether it’s making jokes with my friend on the phone, watching a sitcom or whatever it is that you need to do, just make yourself LAUGH. To me, laughter is the BEST medicine. I discovered an Instagram filter recently and I just kept messing with it and laughing my ass off. Don’t believe me? See for yourself.

Two more videos?

*Has assignment submission* Me: Turns into a pig.

As promised, here are some motivational videos/podcasts:
Don’t Doubt Yourself
Let It Go
Must Have Beliefs
Love Yourself
Learn This
Purpose To Living
Are You Feeling Trapped?
Transform Your Pain To Real Growth
Powerful Morning Affirmations – I listen to this sometimes whilst getting ready

P.S.: Every emotion/feeling is healthy to a certain capacity. If someone passed away tomorrow, feeling ‘happy’ won’t do you shit. So understand that all emotions are essential – it’s about how you deal with it and the capacity of that feeling. So no, it is NOT healthy to be happy ALL THE TIME. [Coming from a happy person]. You are not meant to be perfect. You are meant to be uniquely you. You are not meant to be a robot. You’re meant to be HUMAN.

Reprogram Your Subconscious – Change Your Life

Conscious mind – Active in your waking life
Subconscious mind – Active ALL THE TIME

Your life is a representation of your current and past thoughts/feelings (NOT saying what happened to you is your fault). Think about a day you woke up and said “this day sucks already” or “this won’t work” and then it happened. WHY? Because that’s what you affirm and believe. Thought patterns like “people always let me down” and “I’m NOT good enough” are the reasons why your relationships with good people DO NOT last. It’s time we take control of our lives and reprogram our minds. To understand the ‘law of attraction’ more, watch ‘The Secret’ on Netflix and read about the ‘placebo effect’

Reprogram Your Mind Before Sleeping To Change Your Life

To-Do:

  1. Plan your tomorrow – Get a journal and write down what you want to do tomorrow and stick to these plans if possible. “If you want to win the day, win the evening.”
    List things like time to wake up, someone to call, tasks/work to complete, etc…
  2. Review your goals every NIGHT – Why? To set your mind for success. You need a constant reminder of your long-term and short-term goals, which is also a reminder of your purpose
  3. Gratitude – Practice gratitude to program your subconscious mind to think in abundance and scarcity. You can write something as small as “had a nice, warm meal.” or “sunny day,” “got a phone call from a friend.” Some people don’t even have a roof on their head or a friend to open up to.
  4. Ask your subconscious mind – Think of a problem that you currently have and ask your subconscious mind how to solve it or find a solution. I know this sounds odd, but how many times have you thought about something before bed and then woke up in the middle of the night thinking “I should do a,b,c” or “this isn’t good for me, I think I should let it go.” You can ask questions regarding your financial state, your relationships, your work life, etc…
  5. Hypnotherapy – No I don’t mean losing control of your mind and following a green light in the middle of the street. Hypnotherapy is a form of a safe, complimentary medicine that therapists use to help change your thought patterns without losing control of your mind of course. You can always find hypnosis audios online that consist of affirmations or a meditation for a specific problem or desire.

Again, repetition is required to see a difference. Some things work faster with people and others take a bit longer. Then again, it usually takes around 21 days for something to become a habit (thoughts too). So stay committed and BELIEVE.

I will write more blogs about this topic since it is VERY eye-opening and this has helped me change my self-image and my view on life. This is how I developed healthier relationships, but that doesn’t mean shit won’t hit the fan sometimes. It just means you will have a stronger mind that is more capable of reacting to certain situations and the ability to hold on. It is HEALTHY to feel every emotion but with certain capacity.